Chivalry

In NYC, I've noticed that men typically make a point of allowing women to exit the elevator first. Or at least this is true in the two elevator buildings I frequent. So I make a point of saying thank you whenever they do this - not effusively, but graciously and in keeping with the level of chivalry shown. I try to encourage this sort of considerate behavior whenever I find it.

A far cry from my high school days when we used to play a game I think of as "Feminists & Gentlemen." The game spontaneously evolved because Jim and Josh would try to open doors for me and Steph, and we would (naturally) try to race ahead and open the doors for ourselves. There was one time we were all going to the beach together, and as we headed for the exit, Steph and I just looked at each other and flat-out sprinted to the front doors. We opened them for ourselves, and waited for the guys to catch up to us. They came tearing up behind us and -- as I remember it -- pulled us back through the doors, and then one of them held the door open as the other one heaved us outside again. All in good fun, of course, as Steph and I were almost helpless with laughter, but it was the beginning of a sea change in my world view: the realization that no one was really questioning my ability to open a door and that, in light of that fact, it might behoove me to accept these small courtesies in the spirit they are offered, with dignity and grace.