Love Potion No. 9

On Thursday, after details of Client No. 9's out-of-state service provider emerged, M (an attorney who is perhaps in her 50s) expressed resentment and jealousy of the hooker. M focused like a laser beam on the unfairness that a high-priced hooker is able to live in a chi chi neighborhood in Manhattan, while M -- a well-educated and law-abiding citizen -- is struggling to get by in a much less fashionable part of the state.

Even glossing over the question of whether the hooker was really all that financially successful before the publicity sent sales of her song skyrocketing, I still found M's resentment baffling. M may not be able to afford a high-flying lifestyle, but she has the respect and affection of her colleagues, a stable job that is not jeopardized by the aging process and -- very significantly -- the ability to look at herself in the mirror without spitting. That is to say, M can be honestly proud of who she is and what she's accomplished. Regardless of whether it has resulted in material wealth.

It is difficult to be happy if one's basic material needs are not met, including some buffer of security against risk. But beyond a certain level, worldly success does not necessarily indicate inner peace, nor does it necessarily increase happiness. It seems to me that if, in the darkest corners of her conscience, a hooker is ashamed of the way she obtained her success, no amount of money (or drugs or alcohol or other distraction) will fill the hollowness inside. To the contrary, nothing will ever be quite enough. There may be some who actually lack this nagging doubt -- but my guess is that most can only suppress or deny it.

And speaking of material wealth not reflecting one's inherent worth (we were?), M might do well to compare the typical pay scale of teachers with that of attorneys.

Setting aside the Spitzer fiasco, this week has been good. It kicked off with Robert Fu's "original Manhattan French language meetup." The group met at 230 Fifth (on Fifth Avenue), which has spectacular city views, and attempted to mingle and socialize in French. Very challenging for me, but I was really glad I went. It's a nice crowd, with a wide range of French language skills represented -- there was even a Japanese guy who didn't know a word of French but was hoping to learn by osmosis or something.

Thursday, I tried my first "Lotus Flow 2" yoga class, which was tough but exhilarating. On Friday, after two days of yoga in a row, I found myself getting pretty emotional ... but then Saturday I felt such a deep sense of peace. It was fun to connect with everyone for mahjong at Patricia's place, and then go rollerblading in the twilight afterward for my first real taste of spring.